Application for Permission

[ToyKraz]

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION

TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: THIS APPLICATION WILL BE INCOMPLETE AND REJECTED UNLESS ACCOMPANIED BY A COMPLETE FINANCIAL STATEMENT, WORK HISTORY, LINEAGE, AND CURRENT MEDICAL REPORT FROM YOUR DOCTOR.

1. NAME_/_
2. HEIGHT_
4. BOY SCOUT RANK_IF NO, PLEASE EXPLAINMOTORCYCLE?_ TRUCK WITH OVERSIZED TIRES?WATERBED?
9. IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER MEANS TO YOU?_
10. IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES LATE MEAN TO YOU?
13. WHEN WOULD BE THE BEST TIME TO INTERVIEW YOUR FATHER? _
B.IF I WERE BEATEN, THE LAST PLACE I WOULD WANT BROKEN IS MY _
15. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE IF YOU GROW UP?_

I SWEAR THAT ALL OF THE INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICA ANT TORTURE, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS.

___
SIGNATURE (THAT MEANS YOU SIGN YOUR NAME)

THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST. PLEASE ALLOW FOUR TO SIX YEARS FOR PROCESSING. YOU WILL BE NOTIFIED IN WRITING IF YOU ARE APPROVED. PLEASE DO NOT CALL OR WRITE (as it will delay your application.)

 

[BlueHaya]

You for got that if you do pass the screening you must agree to Random Drug Testing and GPS installation on any vehicle you may be in on or around.

 

[semi]

i have a hard enough time just getting them to open the front door when they don't know me

...they would shoot me on sight if i answered that questionaire

 

[ToyKraz]

I have tried to edit this several times to get to to post correctly but no luck. Sorry it looks like crap.

 

[ToyKraz]

NAME
DATE OF BIRTH
HEIGHT
WEIGHT
IQ
GPA
SOCIAL SERCURITY #
DRIVERS LICENSE #
BOY SCOUT RANK
HOME ADDRESS
DO YOU HAVE ONE MALEAND ONE FEMALEPARENT? IF NO PLEASE EXPLAIN
NUMBER OF YEARS PARENTS MARRIED?
DO YOU OWN A VAN? MOTORCYCLE? TRUCK WITH OVERSIZED TIRES? WATERBED?
DO YOU HAVE AN EARRING, NOSERING OR BELLY BUTTON RING?
IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DEOS DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER MEAN TO YOU?
IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES LATE MEANTO YOU?
IN 50 WORDS OR LESS, WHAT DOES ABSTINENCE MEAN TO YOU?
WHAT CHURCH DO YOU ATTEND?
WHEN WOULD BE THE BEST TIME TO INTERVIEW YOUR FATHER? MOTHER? PRIEST?
ANSWER BY FILLING IN THE BLANK. PLEASE ANSWER FREELY. ALL ANSWERS ARE CONFIDENTIAL (THAT MEANS I WON'T TELL ANYONE)
A. IF I WERE SHOT, THE LAST PLACE ON MY BODY I WOULD WANT WOUNDED IS THE
C. A WOMAN'S PLACE IS IN THE
E. WHEN I FIRST MEET A GIRL, THE FIRST THING I NOTICE IS HER__
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

I SWEAR THAT ALL OF THE INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, ELECTROCUTION, CHINES WATER TORTURE RED HOT POKERS.

SIGNATURE

THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST. PLEASE ALLOW FOUR TO SIX FOR PROCESSING. YOU WILL BE NOTIFIED IN WRITING IF YOU ARE APPROVED. PLEASE DO NOT CALL OR WRITE (as it will delay your application)

 

[JINKSTER]

(ToyKraz @ Jan. 16 2007,11:43) I have tried to edit this several times to get to to post correctly but no luck. Sorry it looks like crap.

NEXT!

 

[sFlaBusa]

Good one!

Spencer

 

[CAT3]

I like the first post, What do you want to be IF grow up...sounds more likely than WHEN you grow up. My wife says she's scared of anyone coming over to take my daughter out...of course, that'll be hard to do when she wont see the outside world from age 5y/o to 30. After 30, she can go do whatever she wants to do...I think.

Arriyahnna at 7months old (she's now 8mo). Link Removed

 

[Wag]

Ahhhh, the stories I could tell about guys wanting to date my sisters. Three of my brothers and I would tell them, "Touch her and you will die slowly and painfully." My sisters hated us.

Funny post, man!

--Wag--

 

[heavybusa]

you dads have your work cut out for you.

 

[JINKSTER]

To date?...my oldest daughter has brought home exactly 2 boys to meet dad....and when asked?...neither of them were interested in going hunting with me...and neither of them have ever been back.

if she ever brings home one i like?...i won't ask.

L8R, Bill.

 

[skid vicious]

out here in jersey, we don't need no application. we can just tell by looking at them. they usually have that "i just banged a wall outlet" hairdo like the gotti kids. and if they don't, the first few sentences out of their mouths usually gives them away.

 

[VaBusa]

I'm glad I have sons...all I need to learn are evasive moves when the angry parents of said girls come banging on my door!

 

[SAMBUSA]

 

[PDBusa]

My plan, probably a repost but.
Boy knocks on door.
I answer cleaning glock.
Invite kid into the room where various guns are laid out and interrogate.
As kid is leaving I will toss him a round of ammo.
If he catches I'll say, "Nice catch, but if you screw up, the next one will be coming at you much faster."