theres a reason for all , believe me brother. Two years ago I lost my job , really bummed me out it was my dream job. When I got home opened my garage to go for a ride on my bike and it was stolen. Two hours after that two close family members were killed. I thought my life would not continue the next day , but all is good. Dont blame god, maybe he saved you in other ways, maybe bigger and better things,, hang tough, it gets better