Difference between men and women.
- Thread starter NightCrawler
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I don't usually post a lot, but had to on this one. Most of my really close friends in my life have been guys. And at least on my end, it has been purely friends, nothing more. Can't speak for the men. There are many women I know that have other interests besides hair salons and Brad Pitt (I do like Brad Pitt myself). I have many interests, some girly, some not. And it usually depends on who I am with at the moment, which of those interests I talk about.
Unfortunately, I sounds like you have only met a certain type of women. Maybe, that is the type you are attracted too. But there are very intelligent, interesting women in this world that are good for more than just sex.
VA and LadyHawk, I am in for some football and beer.
Unfortunately, I sounds like you have only met a certain type of women. Maybe, that is the type you are attracted too. But there are very intelligent, interesting women in this world that are good for more than just sex.
VA and LadyHawk, I am in for some football and beer.
ladies: ALL your guy friends, yes, even the gay ones, are your "backup guys". You have developed and grown an emotional attachment to them called friendship - which, of course is the very basis for ANY good and lasting relationship, be it Emotionally supportive or sexually active.... these backup guy "Friends" [depending, of course, on THEIR current situation] are available to you should something go wrong in your current relationship - which I would never wish on anyone and most people don't really want to think about and face that.... yet, oddly, it DOES happen... I've heard of divorces, separations, affairs actually occuring and it's usually not due to total strangers.
Thus, having a "friend" of the opposite sex who would be there for you EMOTIONALLY, is a backup guy. Why? Because your main guy has failed you and you need a guy to assist with support either emotionally, finaincailly, sexually, whatever.
I've known and noticed women a LONG time through out my life and NEVER have I NOT seen women or girls have backup guys. RARELY have I noticed a woman break with a guy and stay by herself. It's on to the next one - usually a backup guy. I know that sounds pigish but it's what I see. Much of the time, the backup guy is starting to get courted before ANY breakup or indifference has occurred.
I'm not against mixed sex friendships at all, but he DARN WELL better be perfectly fine if *I* am always around when she is with him. I TRUST her, I don't trust him. The profiling is too easy.
And on this topic, I have noticed that everyone of my female friends have wanted more, or thought it was leading to more. Even the ones I expressed I was NOT interested in, and it would never be more than platonic.... and, no, I never laid a hand on them or lead them on with ANY simbliminal inuendo. And I am probably one of the more self controlled males on the planet. STILL gets out of hand. I am talking over YEARS now, not just weeks or months.
In the end, there is nothing wrong with men and women being friends, or falling in love - it's how we are designed to operate anyway. We are SUPPOSED to be together: Yin and Yang etc etc
Insecure is the man who worries about his wife's male friends..... oh yeah? have ya looked at divorce rates recently? Would you trust your own brother? I would not, and I love my brother to death. Being a human, he is subject to the same temptations as anyone including myself. Just look at the stats.... SOMEONE is causing broken homes... oops! is that called "Family Challended" now or some devaluing crap like that? Naw... I'll still call it "BROKEN" because it is... well... broken.... and it is not always the UPS guy
Thus, having a "friend" of the opposite sex who would be there for you EMOTIONALLY, is a backup guy. Why? Because your main guy has failed you and you need a guy to assist with support either emotionally, finaincailly, sexually, whatever.
I've known and noticed women a LONG time through out my life and NEVER have I NOT seen women or girls have backup guys. RARELY have I noticed a woman break with a guy and stay by herself. It's on to the next one - usually a backup guy. I know that sounds pigish but it's what I see. Much of the time, the backup guy is starting to get courted before ANY breakup or indifference has occurred.
I'm not against mixed sex friendships at all, but he DARN WELL better be perfectly fine if *I* am always around when she is with him. I TRUST her, I don't trust him. The profiling is too easy.
And on this topic, I have noticed that everyone of my female friends have wanted more, or thought it was leading to more. Even the ones I expressed I was NOT interested in, and it would never be more than platonic.... and, no, I never laid a hand on them or lead them on with ANY simbliminal inuendo. And I am probably one of the more self controlled males on the planet. STILL gets out of hand. I am talking over YEARS now, not just weeks or months.
In the end, there is nothing wrong with men and women being friends, or falling in love - it's how we are designed to operate anyway. We are SUPPOSED to be together: Yin and Yang etc etc
Insecure is the man who worries about his wife's male friends..... oh yeah? have ya looked at divorce rates recently? Would you trust your own brother? I would not, and I love my brother to death. Being a human, he is subject to the same temptations as anyone including myself. Just look at the stats.... SOMEONE is causing broken homes... oops! is that called "Family Challended" now or some devaluing crap like that? Naw... I'll still call it "BROKEN" because it is... well... broken.... and it is not always the UPS guy
And WWJD, I've got to say something here...I've NEVER seen someone seem to know so much about marriage, yet you're not married, and you seem to think you know so much about being a women, yet you're not...or are you
I have seen photographic evidence of your makeup wearing habits, but I digress...
I have great male friends, been friends with 'em for most of my life...they'd never be my fallback guys, never...if I have problems in life, I turn to my best friend which happens to be a girl for emotional support, no need for financial support because I can take care of myself, so there...and for the record, I have a girlfriend that's divorced and hasn't even dated yet...it's been 2 years, and no, there's nothing wrong with her. I think she's just enjoying her life as is right now, not looking for someone to take care of her...in fact, she now works 2 jobs to keep things going for her and her kids, so your theory doesn't hold much water to me...carry on
I have great male friends, been friends with 'em for most of my life...they'd never be my fallback guys, never...if I have problems in life, I turn to my best friend which happens to be a girl for emotional support, no need for financial support because I can take care of myself, so there...and for the record, I have a girlfriend that's divorced and hasn't even dated yet...it's been 2 years, and no, there's nothing wrong with her. I think she's just enjoying her life as is right now, not looking for someone to take care of her...in fact, she now works 2 jobs to keep things going for her and her kids, so your theory doesn't hold much water to me...carry on
I think that every man wonders what it would be like to have a go with one or all of their female friends... the true testament of a friendship though is that you just wonder about it and recognize that it is just a natural thought that all men have (sweeping generalization) and (I) never really consider it other than as a passing thought. I don't think that it is the precursor of the friendship though. I am sure that there are some men that only become friends with women to try and get some but what kind of person would you really be if that is the only reason you start a friendship? Not a true friend... You may become one but your original intent was not friendship but sex. Attraction is a natural thing it just needs to be put where it belongs in any relationship. Getting Laid is easy. Finding true friends that is a different feat all of its own.
FOR THE RECORD: The "Makeup" pic was COMPLETELY PHOTOSHOPPED by our good man here Bullettrain - and a very good job it was. I don't wear makeup and I hope to GOD no one really thought that was real.
So, because I am not married, I am unable to OBSERVE my married gretheren and learn from them? Or read commonly known facts and statistics? Not to mention friends, family, neighbors, loved ones and my own relationships.... just because I'm single doesn't make me a total idiot when it comes to married life.
I have known a lot of women, over my life starting in kindergarten, so I think I have some valid ideas. Yeah, I'll generalize a lot for discussion, as you know, but there are subtexts going on about people unable to admit or face things that exist in their own lives - usually it's just not a good idea to even bring it up... but sometimes it's fun.
I'm not sayin YOU'RE a cheater or anything like that, but men and women are designed to gravitate toward each other and they do, and it's natural and right.... until someone conciously ALLOWS themselves to cross that line... and usually the person that ALLOWS that uses the lame excuse "it just happened...". No, it didn't.
Like I said, I probably should not have posted in this topic. But we enjoy the controversy on occasion, right? RIGHT? ? ?
So, because I am not married, I am unable to OBSERVE my married gretheren and learn from them? Or read commonly known facts and statistics? Not to mention friends, family, neighbors, loved ones and my own relationships.... just because I'm single doesn't make me a total idiot when it comes to married life.
I have known a lot of women, over my life starting in kindergarten, so I think I have some valid ideas. Yeah, I'll generalize a lot for discussion, as you know, but there are subtexts going on about people unable to admit or face things that exist in their own lives - usually it's just not a good idea to even bring it up... but sometimes it's fun.
I'm not sayin YOU'RE a cheater or anything like that, but men and women are designed to gravitate toward each other and they do, and it's natural and right.... until someone conciously ALLOWS themselves to cross that line... and usually the person that ALLOWS that uses the lame excuse "it just happened...". No, it didn't.
Like I said, I probably should not have posted in this topic. But we enjoy the controversy on occasion, right? RIGHT? ? ?
I'll bring the chips and salsa!(VaBusa @ Aug. 09 2007,05:10)And there's something wrong with that?!
Gals, football party at my place...I've got the keg
I enjoy the controversy, as you well know(WWJD @ Aug. 09 2007,09) FOR THE RECORD: The "Makeup" pic was COMPLETELY PHOTOSHOPPED by our good man here Bullettrain - and a very good job it was. I don't wear makeup and I hope to GOD no one really thought that was real.
So, because I am not married, I am unable to OBSERVE my married gretheren and learn from them? Or read commonly known facts and statistics? Not to mention friends, family, neighbors, loved ones and my own relationships.... just because I'm single doesn't make me a total idiot when it comes to married life.
I have known a lot of women, over my life starting in kindergarten, so I think I have some valid ideas. Yeah, I'll generalize a lot for discussion, as you know, but there are subtexts going on about people unable to admit or face things that exist in their own lives - usually it's just not a good idea to even bring it up... but sometimes it's fun.
I'm not sayin YOU'RE a cheater or anything like that, but men and women are designed to gravitate toward each other and they do, and it's natural and right.... until someone conciously ALLOWS themselves to cross that line... and usually the person that ALLOWS that uses the lame excuse "it just happened...". No, it didn't.
Like I said, I probably should not have posted in this topic. But we enjoy the controversy on occasion, right? RIGHT? ? ?
I do think you donned that makeup and don't make me go looking for the mugshot
It's all good WWJD...observation is a wonderful thing, but being in that situation isn't always cookie cutter black and white. I too can say exactly the same thing about things like stats (which can be horribly wrong or misconstrued), and I too can easily sit here and name off people that I see going through or that have gone through things we've discussed and done the exact opposite of what you've observed. It's all subjective...
I have to say that a lot of how women and men react to one another depends on their maturity level. At younger ages, many women likely DO NEED a man to make then feel complete. I can tell you as a woman approaching 40 faster than I care to admit, I feel exactly the opposite and would go out of my way to make sure I don't lean on a man, especially for financial reasons. Perhaps that's just me; I won't assume I'm answering for every woman out there. Men may never change; I don't know...I'm not one of 'em...I do know that they need certain things throughout life to get them by, and that's perfectly okay, just don't expect to find a life long relationship in each and every one of those encounters.
I definitely agree with you on the maturity thing! good call. but also, inside every mature woman is a little girl who surfaces from time to time, with seemingly impractical needs. you know I generalize a lot for the sake of discussion, but people do need to connect, and SOMEONE is having affairs [usually due to lack of emotional intimacy not sexual] and that SOMEONE is not always someone ELSE... if ya catch me drift 
NOT SAYIN' YOU, just saying...
it's like hayabusa accidents: it's always someone else... or is it?
I do love you women in a big way though. you're half the reason I enjoy being alive
[the other half is activiteis, sleep and toys]. And plan to get married the minute I can find one that is fun loving, and able to accept the fact that there is no reason to change me. but we'll definitely start as friends first.
As an aside, as a single guy, I am VERY CAREFUL to NEVER makes close friends with any married women. Ever. 1 + 1 DOES = 2. There can only be trouble ahead on that path for everyone involved.
NOT SAYIN' YOU, just saying...it's like hayabusa accidents: it's always someone else... or is it?
I do love you women in a big way though. you're half the reason I enjoy being alive
As an aside, as a single guy, I am VERY CAREFUL to NEVER makes close friends with any married women. Ever. 1 + 1 DOES = 2. There can only be trouble ahead on that path for everyone involved.
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