I just thought of a better work related idiot.
We hired a jackass named Andre who was the ultimate chronic liar. He was stuck in the '70s. He claimed his dad who lived in California was a millionaire 3 times over (Andre lived in a shack in Gary Indiana). His aunt was a famous personal cook for movie stars...Andre ate dinner many times with the guy from Hart to Hart, the Bionic Woman, Farrah Fawcett, Shatner ect. and all in their homes!
Not only was he an unskilled grunt laborer, he was also a NINJA! He was moving cinder blocks on a job site and one guy dared him to break one with his head. They had to stop him before he killed himself. If I was there I would have been egging him on.
He was the type of guy who never shut up. If you had to work with him, you'd hear his voice echoing through your head hours after getting home. It was funny at first but got to the point nobody wanted to work with him and no other departments would take him. One day the service manager tells him to go clean out the pipe trailer...really sucky job especially in the dead of winter but it would keep him away from us for at least a week.
Out in the yard there were 8 semi trailers lined up for storage. The one for piping was sort of turned into a dumping ground. The floor was made of WOOD. There were hundreds of WOOD bins along the walls for holding small copper fittings. There were gallons of cutting oil and refrigeration oil stored in there and over the years the floors had become saturated with it from spills.
Few hours go by and some of the shop guys notice smoke billowing out of the trailer. Turns out Andre gathered a bunch of cardboard and lit it on fire in the middle of the trailer to stay warm! When they got up there he was in a panic in the BACK of the trailer with a wall of fire between him and the only way out!
They put the fire out and he starts acting all pissed off claiming he had everything under control. Later he tells me he's going to do the same thing tomorrow except this time he's going to bring newspapers from home because it's a little known fact that newspaper doesn't produce smoke.
He was fired shortly after that. He ended up getting a job at an apartment complex and a few months later I read in the newspaper where a big portion of it burned down. Not sure if he had anything to do with it or not. About 8 years pass and I run into him again last year. Hasn't changed a bit and so far Darwin still has not caught up with him.