Our Blond Members
- Thread starter Pine
- Start date
celticBandit
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A blond gets a job as a PE teacher. She notices a boy standing in the field on his own while all the other kids are running and having fun. she feels sorry for him and goes over to him.
Blond: "You OK?"
Boy: "Yes"
Blond: "You know it's OK to play with the other kids."
Boy: "It's best I stay here"
Blond: "Why?"
Boy: "Because I'm the f**kin goalie"
Blond: "You OK?"
Boy: "Yes"
Blond: "You know it's OK to play with the other kids."
Boy: "It's best I stay here"
Blond: "Why?"
Boy: "Because I'm the f**kin goalie"
My all time favorite blond joke 
Three blondes died in a car crash trying to jump the Grand Canyon and are at the pearly gates of Heaven. St Peter tells them that they can enter the gates only if they can answer one simple religious question.
The question posed by St. Peter is "What is Easter"?
The first blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey and are thankful..."
"Wrong!, you are not welcome here, I'm afraid. You must go to the other place!" replies St. Peter.
He turns to the second blonde, and asks her the same question: "What is Easter?"
The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second blonde, bangs his head on the pearly gates in disgust and tells her she's wrong and will have to join her friend in the other place. She is not welcome in Heaven.
He then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, "Do YOU know what Easter is"?
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is."
"Oh?" says St Peter, incredulously.
"Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands and feet. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder."
St. Peter smiled broadly with delight.
The third blonde continued. "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."
Three blondes died in a car crash trying to jump the Grand Canyon and are at the pearly gates of Heaven. St Peter tells them that they can enter the gates only if they can answer one simple religious question.
The question posed by St. Peter is "What is Easter"?
The first blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey and are thankful..."
"Wrong!, you are not welcome here, I'm afraid. You must go to the other place!" replies St. Peter.
He turns to the second blonde, and asks her the same question: "What is Easter?"
The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second blonde, bangs his head on the pearly gates in disgust and tells her she's wrong and will have to join her friend in the other place. She is not welcome in Heaven.
He then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, "Do YOU know what Easter is"?
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is."
"Oh?" says St Peter, incredulously.
"Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands and feet. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder."
St. Peter smiled broadly with delight.
The third blonde continued. "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."
my all time favorite blond joke
Three blondes died in a car crash trying to jump the grand canyon and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St peter tells them that they can enter the gates only if they can answer one simple religious question.
The question posed by st. Peter is "what is easter"?
The first blonde replies, "oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in november when everyone gets together, eats turkey and are thankful..."
"wrong!, you are not welcome here, i'm afraid. You must go to the other place!" replies st. Peter.
He turns to the second blonde, and asks her the same question: "what is easter?"
the second blonde replies, "easter is the holiday in december when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of jesus."
st. Peter looks at the second blonde, bangs his head on the pearly gates in disgust and tells her she's wrong and will have to join her friend in the other place. She is not welcome in heaven.
He then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, "do you know what easter is"?
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks st. Peter in the eyes, "i know what easter is."
"oh?" says st peter, incredulously.
"easter is the christian holiday that coincides with the jewish celebration of passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and jesus was later deceived and turned over to the romans by one of his disciples. The romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands and feet. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder."
st. Peter smiled broadly with delight.
The third blonde continued. "every year the boulder is moved aside so that jesus can come out and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."
fail
Does bottle sort of blonde count ???
