Harley Jokes.....

Liltroy said:
Top 40 things you won't ever hear from a Harley rider
_________________________________________


40. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.

39. I'll take Shakespeare for a thousand, Alex.

38. Duct tape won't fix that.

37. Hey, Peaches? I think we should sell the pickup and buy a minivan.

36. Come to think of it, I'll have a martini.

35. We don't keep no firearms in this house.

34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?

33. You can't feed that to the dog.

32. I thought Graceland was tacky.

31. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

30. Wrestling's fake.

29. Hey, Peaches? Did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?

28. We're vegetarians.

27. Do you think my gut is too big?

26. I'll have grapefruit and whole wheat toast instead of the biscuits and gravy.

25. Listen, Peaches. I love animals too, but we just don't need another dog.

24. Who gives a damn about NASCAR? Let's watch soccer!

23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

22. Nope. I’m going to have to say quits after this new ink. Ten tattoos is enough for any man.

21. Smoking is such a nasty habit.

20. I just couldn't find a thing at K-Mart today.

19. I wonder if I can get some quieter pipes?

18. Hand me that metric wrench there.

17. The tires on that truck are too big.

16. "That's one small step for man. One giant leap for mankind."

15. I've got it all on the C: drive.

14. Light beer just tastes better.

13. Sturgis is too far to ride to.

12. Brass knuckles and chains are for sissies. I prefer kung-fu!

11. Hustler? No, I subscribe to National Geographic.

10. I shaved my beard because it made me look like an inbred redneck hill scoggin.

9. Checkmate.

8. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

7. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

6. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

5. Do these leather chaps make my ass look too big?

4. I'd like to open this annual meeting of the International Neurosurgery Association with a poem written by Robert Frost ...

3. I’m thinking of going back to school.

2. Those shorts really ought to be a little longer there, Peaches. I mean, hell, your ass is showing when you ride behind me.

... and the number one thing you will never hear a Harley owner say:

1. No more for me. I'm ridin'!
Click to expand...


Numbers 23, 18, & 12 rule!!!
 
What do Harley's and german shepards have in common????

















They both love to ride in the back of a pick-up truck!:laugh:
 
Why do Harley guys ride with leather tassles???



















It's the only method of elbow whipping themselves as punishment without wrecking by dropping a hand off the ape-hangers! :laugh:
 
Why do Harley guys ride with leather tassles?










































its the only way they can tell if they're moving.:rofl:
 
Why did the Harley guy pay $20,000 grand for a bike with 60 hp when I paid $1200 for my 22 hp craftsman riding lawnmower???


















uhhhh...no joke here...why did he do that??:whistle: ...and my lawnmower has reverse!:laugh:
 
04stretchedbusa said:
I OWN A BUSA AND A CUSTOM BUILT HARLEY PLUS BET OTHER MEMBERS DO TO .I LOVE BOTH MY BIKES SO SOME OF YOU NEED TO GROW UP THIS AINT A SIGHT TO CUT OTHER BIKE BRANDS DOWN CAUSE A BIKE IS A BIKE NO MATTER WHAT IT IS.
Posted via Mobile Device
Click to expand...

:laugh:

post-12-86584-whatbush0rj.jpg
 
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Yes cap lock is to make sure some of you can read it. You would not like it if people got on our site & cut down our busa,s so grow the h-ll up.
 
Not really a joke, but still pretty funny...We have a guy at work that has a 01 Harley dyna/lectric/wida/slida/glida??? I really don't know what it is - not a sportster but not a couch with tassles either.

Anyways, we were talking "shop" with Harley (name with-held to protect the innocent) and a riding buddy that used to rip the Dragon's face off on a CBR XX 1100 Blackbird and looked just like Al off Happy Days (honest). Then Harley commences to tell us how he dropped his bike off at the local Harley stealership - handed them $7,000, and said "give it all you can do with this".

My buddy instantly went for the question (in all seriousness - no mal-intent here) - so what'd you end up with after $7,000 worth of work? the reply..."110 hp! (chest out - bowed up)"...my buddy instantly did the WTF?...Harley gave the "that's right - read em and weep sucka (like a proud dad)".


My buddy replied..."you know what it would take for me to get my bike to put out 110 hp ??? ...pullin two sparkplug wires:rofl:"!!!


Harley didn't get it...:laugh: :poke:
 
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04stretchedbusa said:
Yes cap lock is to make sure some of you can read it. You would not like it if people got on our site & cut down our busa,s so grow the h-ll up.
Click to expand...


You know Stretch...in all seriousness - I'd kinda like to here a few good "plastic bike" jokes...I'm sure there have to be some good ones out there as well!:welcome:

I never freak out about the Hayabusa Badge of Honor or anything of that sort. Ride whatcha got and have fun doin it! Most people I run across don't even know what a Hayabusa is. I usually respond with "it's one of those plastic bikes" - then I get the "huh...you ridin wun o' them crrrotch rockets aint che"... (with the draw to put emphasis on the disapproval).:laugh:

Apparently, we all look alike!:lol:


I'm down for some Busa jokes! ...anybody got some?:welcome:
 
Munchie said:
Why did the Harley guy pay $20,000 grand for a bike with 60 hp when I paid $1200 for my 22 hp craftsman riding lawnmower???


















uhhhh...no joke here...why did he do that??:whistle: ...and my lawnmower has reverse!:laugh:
Click to expand...


and a cup holder...:rofl:
 
well, back on topic...
Q: How do you tell which is the Groom at a Harley owner wedding?








































































A: He's the one with the CLEAN mechanic’s shirt.
 
04stretchedbusa said:
I OWN A BUSA AND A CUSTOM BUILT HARLEY PLUS BET OTHER MEMBERS DO TO .I LOVE BOTH MY BIKES SO SOME OF YOU NEED TO GROW UP THIS AINT A SIGHT TO CUT OTHER BIKE BRANDS DOWN CAUSE A BIKE IS A BIKE NO MATTER WHAT IT IS.
Posted via Mobile Device
Click to expand...

Did someones nuts and bolts fall in his cereal this morning or maybe fringe get a little tangled??





It's a "Harley Joke" thread. Really?? :poke:
 
Last edited:
Munchie said:
Not really a joke, but still pretty funny...We have a guy at work that has a 01 Harley dyna/lectric/wida/slida/glida??? I really don't know what it is - not a sportster but not a couch with tassles either.

Anyways, we were talking "shop" with Harley (name with-held to protect the innocent) and a riding buddy that used to rip the Dragon's face off on a CBR XX 1100 Blackbird and looked just like Al off Happy Days (honest). Then Harley commences to tell us how he dropped his bike off at the local Harley stealership - handed them $7,000, and said "give it all you can do with this".

My buddy instantly went for the question (in all seriousness - no mal-intent here) - so what'd you end up with after $7,000 worth of work? the reply..."110 hp! (chest out - bowed up)"...my buddy instantly did the WTF?...Harley gave the "that's right - read em and weep sucka (like a proud dad)".


My buddy replied..."you know what it would take for me to get my bike to put out 110 hp ??? ...pullin two sparkplug wires:rofl:"!!!


Harley didn't get it...:laugh: :poke:
Click to expand...


:rofl::rofl::rofl::
You guys are killing me... :bowdown::

I got a guy at work rides a sportster and I pull up and he's ranting and raving
about how traffic is slowing him down...And I'm thinking...you ride a sailboat,
your definition of fast, power, and speed is completely different then mine.

So I pull up another day and bigmouth tells me that the local Harleyship is
having a huge sale and I should "go buy a real bike". I let him know, "do you
realize I can take you in any race with just one gear, you pick the race.
Top end...I could probably do it in 3rd...quarter mile...heck, 3rd probably still
work...":laugh:
 
Last edited:
I'm surprised that Harley Davidson hasn't produced a special edition officially
licensed and endorsed child's toy called "Mr. Potato Potato Head."
 
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